Natural Disaster

It’s like a tornado, it  stirs up everything around me
It’s like an earthquake it causes the ground from under me to come up.
It’s like a fight but I’m losing and I never lose.
Now my face is breaking out, my hair is turning grey and my nerves began to make my legs shake out of control.
If the outside world knew what was going on in my head they would check me into a mental hospital.
I feel like a puppet and whoever is controlling the strings is testing my strength.

“ Take a deep breath and meditate, you can’t allow things like this to get to you” is the most ignorant advice anyone could ever give to one dealing with stress.
It feels like the people around me thrive off chaos. Something is wrong if nothing is wrong, type of people.

“ Guess what happened today” kind of people

or

“ Are you sitting down? You gon have to sit down for this one”.

“ Well she said this and then she said that then such and such told her this and I overheard this” kind of humans.
I want to scream and yell and tell everyone I don’t give a fuck about what he or she said I care not about what happened today, no I’m not sitting down and if I were I wouldn’t wanna hear shit you gotta say. Why? Cuz I’m protecting my peace

but

Chaos is only chaos when you handle it with chaos

-March 19,2019